I’m not a fan of grinder or scruff or match.com or any other digital queer dating site. But give me a tumblr of vintage beefcake and I'm content for hours. I know that these men existed in a different time with different ideas about affection, sex, gender and identity. I know that they may not have had a sense of themselves as gay or queer as I do of myself. But there is always a detail, a glance, a smile, touching knees, arms thrown over each others shoulders, clutching a little too tight, which causes my eyes stop and my imagination to run wild.
Who are they? Were they lovers? Did they survive the war? Did one save the others life? Did they build a life together? I have always been able to build my own back stories, like having a crush on a stranger. My day-dream lovers. Fairy tale princes. Shining knights. In some ways I’m still 15 yrs old, lost in a dream, sitting in algebra planning my wedding. These are my paper boyfriends.